I was at a lovely and incredibly fun wedding this past weekend where one of my dearest high school friends married her best friend, an incredible man who also happened to graduate with us. I couldn't have wished for two better people to find each other! Love them both!
While at that wedding I had the wonderful fortune of spending time with some others who I haven't really seen at all since high school. How sad I am to have missed out on the last 5 years of their lives! I have always been guilty of letting myself get too pulled in to where I am in the moment - even to the point of neglecting those I love who aren't in that particular moment. I regret doing that with those friends from high school and those who could have been friends since.
It really hit me how far I'd let myself stray from home and my life there when one guy asked "Did you ever think you'd be dancing with me some day?"
I'm sure he didn't mean it to be, but that statement felt like a shot in the gut to me. Had I dreamed of the chance to dance with this person? No. Would I have ever turned him down? No. Was I surprised to be dancing with him this weekend? No. Not at all. I'd actually been looking forward to it!
There is clearly a gap between the messages I intend to send to others and the messages they are receiving from me. I have nothing but positive things to say about the people I spent time with this weekend - always have - and yet, they are picking up on a distance between us. Reading the things I have said and done over the years as a sign that I'd rather not spend time with them. How very sad.
I have some serious thinking to do about the way I act and the things I say if those are the messages that I am sending out to people who I would truly love to spend more time with and enjoy.
Did you ever think...?
No - I guess I never have thought about it as much as I should.
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